The Family: December 2012

Saturday, December 8, 2012

Share These Principles

The Proclamation to the World

The proclamation was given at a time when views of the family were beginning to change and over time those views have begun to get worse. The definition of families from the world’s standpoint keeps changing. We see more and more broken families, unmarried individuals, couples choosing not to have children, and single parent homes. Marriage has begun to be taken very lightly or has been seen as having no purpose at all. Family values are continually decreasing. We as members of the church understand that marriage and families if vital to exaltation. I know that I want to learn more about the family and how I can help others understand that sacred gift God has given us.

In the first sentence the First presidency states the importance of marriage and that it is ordained of God for the union of man and woman. Marriage is one of the most important steps to return to live with God and attain eternal life. We have been created in the image of God. I think that when we truly believe and understand this we are able to be charitable to others. Judging someone’s appearance negatively is disrespectful to them, yourself, and most importantly God. We each have a purpose here on earth to grow and to learn in order to return to our Father in Heaven. I think that in the world today people are confused. They question their purpose in life and many are questioning their gender. I know that God has made us individually and made us the gender we are so that we can fulfill the roles as such of being a mother or father.

In the premortal world we were taught God’s plan and then had the choice to follow it. Everyone on the earth has accepted the plan but some do not remember. I know that we are here to fulfill the plan and help others remember what that plan was. We then have the ability to be sealed to our families on earth in the temple to then live together beyond the veil for eternity. The family unit is where we are best able to learn and grow.

Adam and Eve where commanded to multiple and replenish the earth as are we. Much of the world now believes that there is overpopulation. I view it that God would not send his children to the earth if there was no room for them or if there was no way to sustain life. We are the agents who choose how we take care of our children or the earth. When we understand where everything comes from, humans, and the earth, then we are able to respect them. Along with the commandment to replenish the earth is that, that is to be done between husband and wife. It is a sacred gift from God. Much of the world unfortunately is very confused by this. Society’s acceptance of cohabitation, premarital sex, and abortion his degrading Heavenly Father’s plan. Great blessing will come to those who keep procreation and the family sacred.

I love the section of the Proclamation, the family, because that to me is what the world needs to hear right now. Not only does the world need to hear it but I do. I think that sometimes marriage and having kids could seem scary but it is essential to God’s plan and he will help us fulfill those roles of fathers and mothers if we turn to him for help. The part I liked best was that, “successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities.” The family is where we first understand the principles of the atonement and where we learn about the gospel and commandments. I know that in my future family and home, I want it to be centered on Christ.

The first presidency warns us that if we do not fulfill our duties as mothers and fathers, that we will be judged before God. We are also asked to help the community and government leaders protect the family. Right now in the world there are controversies over gay marriage, divorce laws, and abortion that affect the family. We can help others understand the role of the family and the importance of each one of us individually.

"We call upon responsible citizens and officers of government everywhere to promote those measures designed to maintain and strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society."

~The Family: A Proclamation to the World

It is our duty to share these principles with others. It may be hard but these principles need to be defended. The family unit is sacred and in the world today in is disappearing.

What can you do to protect the family unit in your own family or in your community?

Marriage in Later Years

“The divine plan of happiness enables family relationships to be perpetuated beyond the grave.” ~The Family: A Proclamation to the World

After children have all grown-up and moved out the house feels empty and not so lively. As older couples go through this next stage in life they can continue to be happy in marriage. They can have more time to pursue hobbies or volunteer. They have more time to visit family or do family history work. Regularly attending the temple will also continue to bless your life. Families can be together forever. Knowing this can aid us in our grief as we lose our spouse and loved ones.

Parenting With Love

“Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness.”

~The Family: A Proclamation to the World

In the article “Parenting with Love, Limits, and Latitude, ” authors Craig H. Hart, Lloyd D. Newell, and Julie H. Haupt said these elements should be based upon each child’s individual needs:

· Love, warmth, and support
· Clear and reasonable expectations for competent behavior
· Limits and boundaries with some room for negotiation and compromise
· Reasoning and developmentally appropriate consequences and punishments for breaching established limits
· Opportunities to perform competently and make choices
· Absences of coercive, hostile forms of discipline, such as harsh physical punishment, love withdrawal, shaming, and inflicting guilt
· Models of appropriate behavior consistent with self-control, positive values, and positive attitudes

President Gordon B. Hinckley said, “Every child is entitled to grow up in a home where there is warm and secure companionship, where there is love in the family relationship, where appreciation one for another is taught and exemplified, and where God is acknowledged and His peace and blessings invoked before the family alter.”

Elder Oaks said, “If anyone thinks that godly or parental love for an individual grants the loved one license to disobey the law, he or she does not understand either love or law.” This like when people think that they can do whatever they want because they only live once and tomorrow they die. There are laws to abide by and love to be shared. We are grateful for Christ’s sacrifice that we might be able to repent. It is important to teach our children why there are rules to abide by and their purpose for growth.

Love and Law

Strengthening Families

One of the best ways to strengthen our families is by prayer. Kneel in prayer together each morning and night and bond through the spirit. I know my family was blessed by reading our scriptures and praying together. It didn’t always go right but we tried our best which is important.

I don’t have my own family but my roommates each semester become my family. I know that my apartment has been so blessed by praying together every night. We started growing closer together the first time we all prayed together. I became to see them as the Lord sees them and love them for their quirkiness, talents, and their sweet spirits.

Prayer brings the spirit into a home. It is a chance for a family to come to God with their worries and decisions and have the chance to be guided as of what they should do. Prayer can be helpful in overcoming conflicts and contention in the home. It is a chance to teach children the gospel and the power of prayer.

Wholesome Family Recreation

“Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities.”

~ The Family: A Proclamation to the World

I would consider activities like getting outside in nature as wholesome family recreation. I also don’t think that all wholesome activities have to be active and outside. I think playing board games or painting to decorating the house are fun things that involve everyone interacting with one another.

I think about all the activities that my family did when I was a kid. We liked to go for walks, bike riding, playing basketball and jumping on the trampoline. My dad also likes to travel so we in turn have learned to love traveling. Every summer my family would take road trips. We would always complain but looking back those road trips are what we remember most. I’ve been able to go all across the country and see a lot of historical landmarks. My mom also liked to have us write letters and draw pictures for family members far away or those we knew on missions. As we have all gotten older we still do some of those same things. At Thanksgiving and Christmas we like to play basketball and have a little tournament. We all like to go kayaking and canoeing.

What would you consider “wholesome family recreation”?

Good, Better, Best

Elder Oaks said, “Super family activities may be good for children, but they are not always better than one-on-one time with a loving parent.” This made me think of my family. I do remember all our family vacations and how they drew us together but moments that really meant something to me were the ones where I was one on one with my parents or a sibling.

Elder Oaks, “Family experts have warned against what they call “the overscheduling of children.” In the last generation children are far busier and families spend far less time together. Among many measures of this disturbing trend are the reports that structured sports time has doubled, but children’s free time has declined by 12 hours per week, and unstructured outdoor activities have fallen by 50 percent.

The number of those who report that their “whole family usually eats dinner together” has declined 33 percent. This is most concerning because the time a family spends together “eating meals at home [is] the strongest predictor of children’s academic achievement and psychological adjustment.” Family mealtimes have also been shown to be a strong bulwark against children’s smoking, drinking, or using drugs. There is inspired wisdom in this advice to parents: what your children really want for dinner is you.

Participating in activities with your children will bless your families and cultivate your relationships. I think that what Elder Oaks said is really what is important, the one-on-one interactions that let them know you love and care for them.

Multiply and Replenish the Earth

“The first commandment that God gave to Adam and Eve pertained to their potential for parenthood as husband and wife. We declare that God’s commandment for His children to multiply and replenish the earth remains in force. We further declare that God has commanded that the sacred powers of procreation are to be employed only between man and woman, lawfully wedded as husband and wife.” ~ The Family: A Proclamation to the World

The Family

http://speeches.byu.edu/?act=viewitem&id=777

Something I thought was interesting was that in Henry Eyring’s talk, he talked about how Heavenly Father wouldn’t send his children to the earth if they were going to deplete. I thought this was interesting because so many people right now are talking about overpopulation and that we need to control the birth rate. But Heavenly Father created the earth so that his sons and daughters could multiple and replenish the earth. It is up to the people to take care of the earth as it should.

People are worried about overpopulation but really there are low fertility rates around the world. Why? Many reasons such as health, war, disease, economy etc. But view is that it is due to the disintegration of the family unit. Children are not seen as a priority. So many people are cohabitating, postponing families for careers, or choosing to live a ‘child-free lifestyle.’

Statements on Birth Control:

http://www.lds.org/handbook/handbook-2-administering-the-church/selected-church-policies?lang=eng#214

Birth Control

http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=2865991a83d20110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=198bf4b13819d110VgnVCM1000003a94610aRCRD

Birth Control

http://www.lds.org/topics/birth-control?lang=eng

Mothers as Nurturers

“Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children”

~ The Family: A Proclamation to the World

My favorite quotes’, regarding mothers:

“Motherhood is near to divinity. It is the highest, holiest service to be assumed by mankind. It places her who honors its holy calling and service next to the angels.” ~The First Presidency

Elder Richard G. Scott said,

“Satan had unleashed a seductive campaign to undermine the sanctity of womanhood, to deceive the daughters of God and divert them from their divine destiny. He well knows women are the compassionate, self-sacrificing, loving power that binds together the human family….He has convinced many of the lie that they are third-class citizens in the kingdom of God. That falsehood has led some to trade their divinely given femininity for male coarseness.”

Sister Beck said,

“Who will prepare this righteous generation of sons and daughters? Latter-day Saint women will do this – women who know and love the Lord and bear testimony of Him, women who are strong and immovable and who do not give up during difficult and discouraging times.” This really impressed me. It also showed me the significance it is of my divine role of being a mother and nurturer.

“There is no more noble work than that of a good and God-fearing mother.” “…but she who rears successfully a family of healthy, beautiful sons and daughters, whose influence will be felt through generations to come…deserves the highest honor that man can give, and the choicest blessings of God.” I think that this is an important thing for women to understand. The women of the world today are confused about their roles and are fulfilling careers and working outside the home.

I liked President Benson’s words when he said, “Mothers who help families pray and play together will stay together and will bless children’s lives forever.”

President Benson talked about the widows and mothers who for various reasons need to work outside the home and support themselves, and said, “But these instances are the exception, not the rule.” I think still too often even women of the church want think that this means it is perfectly acceptable to have a career. Whereas I don’t think it is necessarily wrong, I still think a woman should be in the home raising and loving her children and ready to be at hand to them.

To those who have not yet married or had children or who cannot have children:

Sister Sheri Dew has not had the chance to marry nor have children. She is a big example to me of a righteous sister in Zion. Side note, one of my absolute favorite books is by her called, “No One Can Take Your Place.” Such a good read!! Back to motherhood here are some of her words:

“both God the Father and Adam called Eve “the mother of all living” – and they did so before she ever bore a child….It is the essence of who were are as women. It defines our very identity, our divine stature and nature, and the unique traits our Father gave us.”

“Every one of us can show by word and by deed that the work of women in the Lord’s kingdom is magnificent and holy. I repeat: We are all mothers in Israel, and our calling is to love and help lead the rising generation through the dangerous streets of mortality.”